From the City to Asbury

[Originally written on this date in 2004]

After recovering from the previous evening’s festivities, we managed to drag ourselves out of bed, get dressed and drive up to Newark in order to catch the PATH into the City.  The weather was rather favorable which was nice, as walking in the extreme cold or while it is raining really kills the joy of it all, but thankfully that was not the case.  During the train ride, we had one of those obnoxiously loud conversations about dead bodies and what not.  The lady that was sitting across from us looked absolutely horrified.

Once in the City, we hoofed it up Church to Canal where we encountered much pedestrian traffic, most likely due to the fact that people were out shopping for the impending holiday.  Having plenty of experience with moving among said traffic, Jon took my hand in his and we just pushed our way through the people.  At last we arrived at Unimax, where I brought out the list I had made and set straight to purchasing: 16g captive bead rings that would eventually find their home in my ears, 4g black acrylic CBR’s to match the other I already have, 4g red acrylic skull claws, and 14g spikes that would be worn with new short labret studs in my bottom lip and vertical labret.

Even though it had only been a few weeks since I stretched my septum, I decided to buy a 2g taper and 2g red acrylic plug so I would be prepared when the hole was ready to stretch again.  Lastly I would like to note that I paid wholesale on all of above mentioned items, which brought my total to $25 and was fairly reasonable, but Jon picked up the tab anyway.

Went across the street to grab some hot dogs and sodas from one of those sidewalk vendors and headed for the train, as we wanted to leave the City before the sun went down.  On the ride back, these guys just would not stop staring at us.  People are severely lacking in manners these days, and the staring thing is getting real old, and completely unnecessary.  In fact, Jon decided to make loud remarks about their clothes, hair, facial features and anything else he could think of while staring straight at them.  People turned to look at them and I burst out laughing as they became the center of attention and were visibly embarrassed.  Jon smiled broadly and took my hand, ensuring to give them a good glare as we got off.

Upon our return to his house we set about changing for that evening’s festivities, which included wearing some of the newly acquired jewelry.  Hair was quiffed, clothes sorted to coordinate, boots polished, silver in just the right places and I find myself staring into the eyes of an amazing human being, wondering how I got to be so lucky.  We smoke and do shots – for once those are the only substances we partake of before getting into the Chevy, surf tunes on high volume as it takes to the highway.

Arriving in Asbury, he parks the Chevy a block over from the Lanes and we take a moment to wet or whistles with whiskey, a flask finding its way into a pocket inside his coat.  He smiles and produces a comb to tidy up our hair, which leads to several minutes of groping and kissing like we’re teenagers trying not to get caught.

We hadn’t been to the Lanes on a Saturday night, and I must say that I was kind of surprised to see plenty of people were already there and the band was swinging.  We bowled on lane 13 for a while, though due to our intoxicated state, neither of us did very well.  At some point I was struck by hunger, so we paused the game and hit up the snack bar.  Cheap food is always good, and I dined on this delicious chicken sandwich with a side of nuclear fries and onion rings.  After finishing up our game, we returned the shoes and drank the contents of the flask while Crimson Ghost Society played.  They do surf versions of Misfits tunes, so it is all instrumentals with no vocals and it was awesome.

Cocktails were purchased from the bar and after downing them Jon brings me outside because he said he needs some air.  We wander down to the beach where he tells me he is having a great time and I concur.  He uses the moment to take me in his arms and drown me in kisses, which makes me so happy I could burst.  Then he says those words again while holding my face in his hands, though this time I say it too and the expression in his eyes is priceless.

Upon returning to the Lanes, we are excited to see Gein and the Graverobbers on stage.  Drunken dancing ensued because Jon insisted that we could not just stand there like everyone else, and we managed to clear a small area that caused some people to gripe.  The band was into it and encouraged others to move to the beat, so eventually there were two other couples that joined us and it was amazing.

The last thing I remember was the dark highway and falling asleep on his arm.  Then a sweet voice quietly roused me from my slumber by saying: “Hun wake up, we’re home.”

Needless to say, after all we did that day, we were quite happy to pass out.

Autumn Celebrations

[Originally written on this date in 2004]

Last Thursday I took a trip into the City to pick up a few pieces of body jewelry – $40 bought me two 12g circular barbels [with spiked ends for septum], two 16g nostril screws [with spiked ends], two 14g rings [for lip], one 14g curved barbel [for vertical labret] one 16g ring [for right helix] and one 14g retainer to replace the one I lost.  Obviously it was a short and very to-the-point visit, but that is because I did not want to waste too much time before heading down to South Jersey, where I would be spending the weekend with Jon at his request.

Spent most of the afternoon watching random things on t.v., then headed to a diner for some grub.  Have I mentioned how much fun it is to go out in public?  While I am certain that I have, it bears repeating because I cannot have enough moments where I enjoy the company of my best friend.  It is not that I lacked in the confidence department before we met, though admittedly I am quite shy and socially awkward, but when you are out with someone who has about as many body modifications as you do, there is a tendency of not giving a shit about anyone else.  No matter where we go or how many other people are around, it is just Jon and me.  Aside from that, I have always had a desire to be one of those visually appealing couples that compliment each other, and I’m certain we achieve that without much effort.

After dinner we hopped over to the theater for Shaun of the Dead, which is a spoof of other zombie flicks that had us both laughing the entire time.  Then again, we did smoke a fat joint in the Chevy before going in and Jon manged to slip a flask of whiskey in, which had been drunk empty before the movie was even half over.  Enjoyed the fact that for the first ten minutes or so of the movie, Shaun and Ed did not realize there were zombies infesting the streets.  There were many moments of hilarity and even some decent gore scenes.  My favorite part was when Shaun and Ed were singing together and a zombie kept chiming in.

The following day after having an intense conversation about what direction we want to take the sideshow troupe [considering that currently it is just the two of us], Jon suggested that we take our minds off everything for a while and whisks me away to dinner at some trendy seafood restaurant.  Between us we have a fair amount of visible tattoos and piercings, a penchant for black clothes and spiked accessories, and generally do not care whether we ‘blend in’ with the atmosphere of whatever place we enter.  We also rocked faux ‘hawks which obviously grabbed attention, as everyone else wore button-down shirts with slacks or blouse and skirt ensembles with heels.  Making a scene has become a major part of our outings, and I greatly enjoy every moment.  Dined on coconut shrimp and drank wine while our loud conversations drifted to the tables around us.  Serves them right for having seated us in the back next to the kitchen, lest we offend the delicate sensibilities of others.

After that he drove me to a lake out in the middle of nowhere and we spent some quality time talking.  The moon and stars were the only light source as we tossed pebbles towards the puddle of ink and tried to guess what was making the various sounds we heard.  Jon absently remarked it was the first day of Autumn as he lit a joint and turned towards me with a smile.  The evening was lost to a handful of mushrooms and tracing shapes in the star-spattered sky.

It gets harder and harder to say good-bye, and I know that I could spend countless hours just existing with him, gazing into those eyes and knowing that I can trust him.

Yesterday my sister and I took a drive up to Starlight for some new mods since I discovered I had more money than previously assumed, though I suspect Jon had something to do with the sudden appearance of those extra bills.  What better way to put it to use than to get more holes poked in my body?

For the longest time, since I apprenticed as a body piercer in fact, I have wanted to get my conches pierced.  However, I know that it can be a difficult piercing to heal due to the thickness of the cartilage in that part of the ear.  Then I discovered dermal punching, and after having my septum done, I decided that I would see if the same procedure would be better.  Had the opportunity to select my own jewelry, so I went with a pair of clear glass plugs that have little skulls painted on the ends in a 4 gauge.

The actual process was not that bad at all, which might be credited to the fact I distracted myself with the current issue of Savage and all the lovely pictures inside.  The pain from the punch was minimal despite the noise the tool made.  It was the pressure from the jewelry that got to me, though over all there was very little blood.  Not sure if I should be disappointed or not, though now that I think about it, I never really did bleed much when I got pierced in the past.  My ears were definitely sore after the whole procedure was finished, and I felt a bit woozy while in the chair so I waited a few minutes before I got up.  At least I ate that day, so I am stumped to as why that happened.  Wound up having to sit down as a second wave got me, but having a small portion of your ears removed will likely do that.  Then it was my sister’s turn to get her ears scalpelled, which was pretty bloody yet fascinating to watch, and I am glad that we got to share the experience.

There was a bit of dried up blood on the backs of the holes when I returned to the apartment in E-town, and sleep was weird because my ears felt tight.  They feel better today, as long as I don’t touch them, which of course I avoid unless I am cleaning them.  Definitely happy with the result and it will be cool to see how they heal.  Then I will have nice little holes in my conches that I can look through, which makes me chuckle a bit.


[Originally written 11.3.03]

After leaving the apartment on Thursday, I headed to Newark to catch the PATH.  Bad timing, as there was not a single parking space to be found, not even in any of the lots.  No big deal, I thought to myself.  Made my way to Hoboken, but that situation wasn’t any better.  In a last-ditch effort, I wound up parking at the Newport Mall.  It was better than paying $8-$10 for one hour in a regular lot, or getting a ticket for being parked somewhere I shouldn’t have been.

Hauled ass to the PATH station.  Luckily I only had to wait one stop and then proceeded to walk as fast as my stumpy legs would let me to Unimax.  Thought they closed at five, but was relieved to find they closed at six.  Bought everything I wanted.  Took my time going back to the station, as it was such a nice day.  However, I did have to remind myself that I was on a bit of a schedule and could not just wander around, as much as I would have really enjoyed it.  Hit traffic on the way back to the apartment, so I didn’t have time to do anything else because I had to drive down to the Shore to meet up with Jon.

It was pretty mild and kind of foggy, which of course set up the perfect atmosphere for haunting the Pine Barrens.  However, first we knocked back several shots of Moonshine and smoked a fat blunt while applying our make-up.  This would be our final performance for the Halloween season, which  unfortunately also reminds us that sideshow in general dies down.  Perhaps that’s due to people getting caught up in all of that ‘holiday’ nonsense, which I admit I am guilty of myself.  However, it’s a period I don’t particularly look forward to, because Jon falls into that predictable drug and alcohol induced funk where he’s detached from everything, including me.  He always manages to pull himself together for my birthday, but between now and then, I know what’s coming and I don’t like it one bit.  Sadly, there doesn’t seem much I can do other than deal with things as they come and support my boy because I love him dearly.

In any event, a couple of hours after my arrival at the Shore, Jon and I were in his Chevy headed towards the woods.  The ‘shine was hitting me kind of hard so I was puffing away on the blunt while grooving to some psychobilly mix CD he had made.  It was dark by the time we reached the Pines, but Jon has an impeccable sense of direction and was able to lead us deep into the towering trees with aid of an oil lamp.  Everything was set up just the way we had left it after last weekends show, and people would be arriving in about half an hour. With the lamp between us, we sat down on a couple of stumps and he made a small orange plastic pumpkin appear out of thin air.  No idea how he does that sort of magic, but I do enjoy the fact that he loves sharing it with me.  Peering inside, I discovered a decadent treat which we split to kill time while waiting for a crowd to build up.

That’s when I noticed Jon had set up the Wall of Death, and I have to admit that I was kind of surprised to see it considering he hadn’t mentioned that he would be performing the stunt that evening.  It concerned me that he was filling up with coke and ‘shine, but at the same time I knew a lecture would have no effect.  He’s the Death Defying Daredevil and knows what he’s doing; all I could do was be there for moral support and ensure that he didn’t get seriously injured.  Doesn’t mean my heart wasn’t racing with anticipated nervousness, or maybe that was just endorphins.

The groups were fairly decent all nite long, stumbling and weaving their way thru our DIY maze of horrors and screaming when they were startled by one of the many scares along the way.  Our sideshow performances seemed fast-paced, but that might be attributed to the substances floating thru my body.  By the time midnite arrived, a large audience had gathered to witness the Wall of Death, and that funny feeling swelled in my stomach once again.  We took a break underneath the structure to wash off our make-up, change out of our costumes and split a blunt.  As he was climbing into his riding gear, Jon asked if I wanted to drag race, and tho common sense dictated that I should have said no, a smile tugged at my lips and I teased that I would totally win.   Should have exercised better judgment, especially knowing my best friend was about to risk life and limb to entertain a bunch of strangers, but my brain certainly wasn’t thinking clearly.  Oh, and I totally got my ass beat.

Took my usual position and announced that there was just three minutes to go until midnite, suggesting that everyone take their seats and prepare for a feat they would not soon forget.  The engine of Jon’s motorcycle roared, echoing deep into the pitch black forest.  A unanimous cheer rose from the audience as he appeared.  For the next fifteen minutes, my heart beat savagely in my chest as I watched him circle around the Wall of Death, showing off his entire repertoire of ticks to heated applause, cameras flashing in waves.  Everyone was on their feet and clapping as hard as they could when Jon settled on the ground once again, helmet held triumphantly in the air.

Sleep came hard when we returned to his house, which made me thankful I had washed my face earlier.

Friday was Halloween!

Drove up to NYC in Jon’s Chevy, faces painted like death and blasting a special Halloween-themed mix CD, blunts burning as fast as the rubber tires.  Parked in some unknown neighborhood and then walked to the village to catch the parade.  Debauchery was had in high levels as we enjoyed the lavish costumed characters that marched down the street.  At one point we found ourselves walking alongside a lobster, lumberjack and several sequined drag queens.  The energy was definitely good and I very much enjoyed myself.

Hit up CBGB afterwards for several shots of whiskey and drag racing in the bathroom.  Pretty much everything after that is a blur of hallucinations and not a moment of being sober until waking up early Saturday evening.

Carnivale  was damn good last nite.  When is it not?  Brother Justin is now in the nut house…oh what fun.  Had a feeling Sophie was going to try dancing the cootch.  Can’t believe that Jonsey agreed to Stumpy’s suggestion, as I was hoping he wouldn’t, especially since I tend not to like Rita Sue.  Ben’s dreams get stranger, particularly with the appearance of  Brother Justin.  Disappointed there was no Scorpion Boy, but a Lobster Gal instead.  How does the vision Ben have when he shook Phineas’ hand fit in?  And why did the symbol on his ring match that on the watch fob Samson had?  What was Lodz saying to management?  Him and the bearded lady are odd, but it’s sweet to see the sideshow freaks be romantically involved with each other.  Next week’s episode is sure to draw out more questions.

Rambling Update of Life

[Originally written 4.9.03]

Going to work felt like a complete waste of time.  Washed more towels this week than clients, and towels don’t tip.  Still depositing $105 in the bank today, so I guess I can’t complain.  However, I will say that it makes me feel terrible at the end of the day, not like a job well done.

Went to dinner on Friday with the Asshole, where I had my first margarita [damn good too].  Picked up a bottle of Bailey’s on the way back to the apartment, which was immediately opened for consuming.  Watched City By the Sea [damn good movie with great footage of Asbury Park] Red Dragon [wicked] and the South Park movie. Smoked ourselves into oblivion, which I suppose made being around him less weird.  Doesn’t mean my mind wasn’t drifting down to the Shore.

Saturday I wasted myself at work and then went E-town again.  Made tacos.  Smoked, drank and ate for the rest of the night.  Today was spent like Saturday, pretty much.  Smoked, drank and ate the whole day.  Watched Jackass: the Movie.  Got absorbed in my own writing.  Didn’t really want to come back here but sort of had to, and I’m not even sure if we resolved that whole him saying I could move back in thing.  Now I can’t sleep.  Aside from the fact I have to wait for my clothes to dry, not sure what’s keeping me awake.  However, it is the last time I have to wash my Crapi uniform.

Still mad that the Asshole and I didn’t get to discuss the living situation.  Been throwing such obvious hints that it’s frustrating he can’t seriously discuss this matter.  Then I started to think that perhaps he is not as serious as he would like me to believe.  If this the case, then I am not going to waste my time waiting for the things that will never come.

If Jon hadn’t given me some mushroom tea the last time I saw him, I would be pretty wound up right now.  Anyway, I went to see my Dad the other and surprised him when I said I have a job.  He didn’t know what to say and I am not sure why I even care about what he thinks.

Then I drove into Newark to catch the Path to Chrsitopher Street.  Went to Unimax, and instead of buying the 14g CBR’s, I opted for a pair of 14g labret studs with red jewels in them, which cost $20 for the set.  Not bad; I like the way they look too.  Walked around SoHo for a while and drooled at all the shops I wanted to go into, but couldn’t, because I am being ‘responsible’ and not spending my money on things I don’t really need. Wish I hadn’t left my camera in the car, as I came across this small abandoned building for rent or lease that was covered in graffiti.  It honestly looked like a carousel house.  Just thought it was an odd structure to be sitting among the tall buildings.  Didn’t make it to Coney Island as planned and I’m pissed because I just read the Jumbo Jet is being taken apart.  Next Sunday is opening day, so perhaps I will get the opportunity to make the journey then.

More snow?  It wasn’t funny the first time. It’s less funny now, especially because school was closed and this pushes my graduation date to Monday.  In good news, Shane came back today.  He had been working, which is cool.  Told him I wanted to get his number to keep in touch, so he’ll be giving me that before I graduate.  Did him a favor today and drove him down to the Menlo Park mall so he could meet up with his old lady.  Guess he didn’t want her to drive up to get him from school in that mess.  That’s so sweet.  He kept thanking me and saying how much he appreciated what I was doing.  Hey, that’s just the type of person I am.  He had said he asked other people and they came up with some lame excuse as to why they couldn’t drive him.

I’m not like everyone else,” I said with a smile.

I know,” he replied, “that’s why I talk to you.

Took myself out to dinner and I am now out of pocket cash.  Would like to learn how to throw knives.  It’s a skill that could come in very handy if it ever needed to.  This was way too long and incredibly random, so I’m going to bed now.

What Life Has Become

[Originally written 4.4.03]

For those of you in Jersey, who saw the snow today?

Believe me, I had to do several double takes just to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating.   [Drinking that mushroom tea last weekend produced quite a bit of those.]  Even asked other people if they saw it too.   In Kenilworth, there is no doubt that it snowed today.  Someone’s attempt at a belated April fool’s joke?  Tee-fucking-hee.

After my third day working at the salon, I am already looking for somewhere else to go.

Anyway, this whole thing with the Asshole asking me to move back in has been on my mind all day.  That is a whole can of worms I sort f don’t feel like writing about because it’s kind of confusing.  He made it perfectly clear  that we we are not dating, and I agree with those terms.  While I may pop over to E-town from time to time, I definitely enjoy my trips to South Jersey where I get to hang out with Jon, as he is my best friend after all.  The only thing missing from the equasion is that I always have to come back here when I’m done, so I can go to work or school.  What I wouldn’t give to hustle with him more frequently.  *sigh*

Will have to see what I can work out with the Asshole, because I don’t want to have fun over the weekend and come back here.  That would just be torture.

I would rather live out of my car than do that.  I would rather find a place in the City to squat than do that.  I would rather take up residence in the most haunted place in this state than do that.  I would rather dig a hole in the middle of the most toxic soaked soil of this state and dwell there than do that.

Going to Coney Island always seems to inspire me.  Relieves me of whatever funk I might be in.  Gives me motivation to keep working, so I can make money, so I can do the things I want.  Oh how I look forward to that.  ::smile::  Don’t know when I am going out there, but rest it will definitely be soon.

Before I get sidetracked [too late], I want to try to make it to Unimax for those 14g CBR’s.  Could I drag my ass out of bed early on a day I don’t have to go to school?

Have way too many other to take care of, and suddenly I feel that I have no time for myself.  Welcome to the fun world of responsibilities…it’s grand.

Lost in the Pines

[Originally written 3.31.03]

Saturday I went to work and got paid for the hours I worked then and on Thursday.  Made $105 in two days, including tips, and that’s not too bad.  It may not seem like much to some, but I have not held a ‘real job’ before, so I’m happy to get paid for doing something and cherish what money I get.

To be quite honest, I don’t believe one can appreciate a little bit of money until one has had a great deal, spent it and has had to live off of very little since.  Having been there, I won’t forget what greed can do.  In no way am I going to go spend crazy with my new income. When I make a bit more, I will buy what I need, which is never that much anyway.

As much as I have always appreciated that Jon spoils me with gifts [either money or other things], there’s a certain sense of accomplishment in knowing that I have actually earned the money myself.  Of course then again, I’ve had way more fun doing that with him than being in the salon.  Which just puts me back in that same debate of why I am doing the so-called responsible thing instead of what I love.  Just because others would never view performing as viable way of supporting oneself doesn’t detract from the fact that it’s what makes me feel most complete.  There are a very select few that ever understood this, and perhaps the reason I considered them my Family.

In any event, I was careless with money in the past.  How easily it was spent to have the fun I felt like I missed out on when I was a teenager.  There were also times I spent it on others, for no other reason than I wanted to be nice.  Yea, some people readily accepted the generosity without so much as a thank-you and now act like it never happened, so I will certainly be less charitable in the future.  Said monies weren’t exactly replaced either, and I learned my lesson the hard way.

At least Jon is proud of me, and that is really all the support I need.

The time spent with him this weekend felt short, but was definitely good.  Drove down to South Jersey right after work on Saturday, which left me feeling slightly exhausted.  We immediately smoked ourselves stupid and consumed food until we were bloated.  Once again our conversations mainly revolved around circus and sideshow things.  There is much knowledge he has that I readily absorb, it’s no wonder that I think about performing more than a ‘real job’.  The more Jon relays his stories about working with various circuses and carnivals, how he traveled to new places and explored what they had to offer, the more I desire to experience it for myself.  Then the thoughts start filling my head.  Why should I have to completely alter my appearance for the sake of fitting into a work environment when I can totally profit off having an unusual one?

Sunday we took a long walk on the beach, which is where I tend to feel the most relaxed.  It’s like nothing else exists for a moment, the gentle roar of waves crashing on the sandy shore becomes almost rhythmic and certainly is soothing.  There’s always a distinct yet sometimes faint salty aroma in the air, which is eagerly sucked into the lungs as a welcomed change from the ghetto jungle that I am used to.  Hours just slip by as we comfortably share silence, occasionally holding hands or sitting down to smoke a joint and get lost in the vast expanse of ocean that stretches into infinity.  No wonder I enjoy escaping here as much as possible.  It’s where I feel safe and secure, without noise and bullshit, without much care or concern for the things that usually invade my thoughts.  We watched the sun set and it is hard to describe as anything less than brilliant; vivid colors fill the sky and dance across the ocean with a strange electricity.

Later on we climbed into Jon’s Chevy and took a drive into the Pines to drink mushroom tea.  Despite the many years of D.A.R.E. programming that I was exposed to during my years in grade and high school, I really fail to see the problem with natural drugs.  Alcohol can be way more damaging and addicting than plants, but that’s just my opinion.  Hallucinogens are not meant to be used as play things either, even tho I’m sure people think LSD or MDMA is like candy.  Jon has explained how those things can build up in your body and cause harmful effects later in life.  Of course people adopt the attitude that they might as well live it up while they can, but as someone who has experienced brief glimpses of death, he certainly advises against being reckless.

In any event, our trips in the Pines are always filled with various sights and sounds that may or may not actually exist.  He makes an excellent guide, pointing out various plant and animal life as we encounter it or offering a useful survival tip.  Suffice to say that I learn more from him than I did from books, and I really enjoy the fact that he loves filling my head.

We happened to stumble across some Outlaw Cirkus members who were having a cook-out and tripping as well.  It was a delightful surprise considering the troupe has been pretty distant from one another, tho from what I understand, they were just squatting in the woods for a few days before moving on to Baltimore.  We all sat around a campfire and passed around the jar of tea while stories of strange creatures said to inhabit the Pines were told.  It’s impossible to determine exactly how long we stayed in the woods, and I don’t remember going back to Jon’s house or saying good-bye to him.  Or even how I managed to drive back up the Parkway, because I had to go to school the next day, but I do know that eventually I wound up in bed and slept quite well.

The Cyclone officially opens in 14 days, and the excitement is certainly building.

Might go to Unimax in the near future, as I lost a bead on my CBB in my tragus and paranoid that the jewelry is going to slip out whilst I’m sleeping.  Also want to purchase two small 14g CBR for them both.  Obviously will get in touch with Jon and ask if he would like to come along.

Lastly, once out of school and working full time, I will have to make time to go out.  Anywhere, really, just to see what’s what; interact with other people and experience life more.  Thanks to drugs and my best friend, I have a vision of a crew of misfit, modified individuals that like to get together to have fun; to stand above these boring masses of flesh and proclaim our unity.  Okay, that sounds kind of corny, but seriously, I just think it’d be cool [do the kids still use that word?] to have a little crew that goes ’round to various places to be seen and heard.

It’s my stupid little fantasy, laugh at it if that will make you feel better, but it could be possible some day.

Adventure in the City

[Originally written 3.10.03]

Departed lodging around quarter to twelve and managed to reach the diner in a decent amount of  time.  Met up with Jon [read: benefactor] in the parking lot, and then we went inside to grab  some lunch, because we would need fuel to walk around the City.  Hauled ass into Newark.  All was well until I had to find parking.

There’s a taxi sitting in the middle of the right turn lane.  Now ordinarily, I would have just went around it.  However, the taxi was sitting right in front of a sign that clearly said NO STOPPING.  Unless the useless bastard couldn’t read, why are you going to park right next a sign that says you can’t?  So being the asshole that I am, I blared my horn and we shouted at him, pointing to the sign when he waved at me to go around, as tho he could hear me.  This obnoxiousness continued until he pulled around the corner, and as I drove passed him by, Jon and I pointed to the sign, then we flipped him off.  [He had rolled down his window, tho I couldn’t care less what he had to say, as I would’ve likely shouted that he was an asinine twat for not reading the sign that was right in front of his face.]  That little incident made us laugh tho.  Stupidity is encouraged…it makes for good fodder.

Should have dressed warmer to go into the City, but I convinced myself it was going to be warm.  We were passing people on the streets that are all bundled up.  My stupid ass is trying to keep warm in the leather jacket that doesn’t zip up; no hat [a raggedy skull-print bandana does NOT count as a hat], scarf or gloves.  Did not let it bother me tho.

Made it to Unimax feeling very numb all over, and Jon is cracking jokes to keep my mood positive.  As we’re checking out the jewelry, I get blindsided by some unknown person.  And…oh…my…goodness.  Out of all the people to possibly run into while purchasing needles and jewelry, it was Mike—an old high school friend I hadn’t seen in a dog’s age.  He was just as surprized to see me, especially with Jon.

The three of us walked and talked for a while; he was sweet enough to offer us a ride back to my car [parked in Newark].  I hate the distance that forms between us, as everytime I see him, it’s by some absurd twist of Fate, but I always appreciate the time we have.  He is one of those people that opens my eyes and helps me see who I really am.  [Shame on me forgetting that.]

We just had random discussions about everything possible.  Jon invited him to come with us to Coney Island, but he had to call into work, otherwise he would have said yes.  However, he did say that someday he really would like to go, so plans will be made in the future.  Mentioned that we have been doing sideshow, suggesting that he should come check it out, and he thought the whole thing sounded really awesome.

Anyway, Jon and I had to get over the bridges before there was too much traffic, and Mike had to head off to work.  Before going our separate ways,  he apologised for loosing touch, but I said it was alright.  Have always been the kind of person that understand shit happens in people’s lives and the world doesn’t revolve around me.  Mike said he would try to stay in touch, but we will see if that actually happens.

The journey to Coney Island was not an easy one.  I swear, every vehicle on the road was trying to hit us.  Traffic galore on 1&9.  Then easy going to the Goethals, until after the toll.  The traffic was dense almost all the way to the Verizzano.  Why?  Apparently people don’t know how to read.  There are numerous signs that warn you of a merge ahead, and yet people decide that this does not apply to them.  Then they try to squeeze and nudge their way in front of you.  How about piss off?  You chose that lane, now you have sit in it.  If you want to be an asshole and gain that 0.000000000000000000001 of a second by cutting in front of me, be my guest.  Sooner or later, the only thing you will be on time for is your own funeral.

Going over the Verizzano was no problem, but I ran into traffic all the way to Cropsey Ave.  How I survived without totally losing it and driving like the rest of the agressive people, I’ll never know.  Perhaps having Jon provide much smoking of joints helped.

There was plenty of light for photos, which was good as the boardwalk was covered with much ice.  Slid once, but Jon caught me before I fell, as I was in no mood to bust my ass, tho there really wasn’t anyone around to see me if I did.  *heh*  Took a few pics of the still dismantled Parachute Jump, a few of the snow covered beach—complete with plastic palm tree, a few of the deserted Thunderbolt grave site and spent the rest on the newly landmarked Child’s restaurant.  We never really ventured down that end of the boardwalk before, and I had to scold myself for not doing so, as the building is such a great work of art.  Was dying for a bathroom and it started to get cold, so I took one last shot of the fading sunset, a few long shots of Astroland and one of the Playland building from accross the street before happily climbing back into my car.  Next trip out will be earlier in the day and focus on the Bowery, as I am trying to capture every prominant feature of Coney Island in all my shoots.

Encountered more traffic on the way back to Jersey, which was hell because I really had to pee.  [What I didn’t understand, is that there were bathrooms on the boardwalk, but none of them were open.]  Fought my way thru traffic and sped towards the Jeresey City mall, practically running to the bathroom.

Feeling better, we stopped in HT for a moment to purchase the $25 scully I saw there on a previous visit.  Wandered around for a bit longer to just window shop and talk shit about the people before leaving, and unfortunately I had to come back to the house to make nice with mom and pack for the weekend.

This concluded my Friday, and I had fun.  Spent almost all my money.  So what?  At least I got out of the house, I didn’t have to go to school and I calmed the urge inside me to visit Coney Island.  We will definitely be going again before the season starts [a month from this Thursday to be exact].  Had a random encounter with Mike after not seeing him for way too long, and as always, he helped me to realise I have to be true to my Self.  Once I have a steady income, I can start doing that.  Last but not least, I got to spend a wonderful afternoon with Jon, tho our adventures were only beginning.

Part II of the weekend

Not being able to sleep and wait for Jon to call, I readied myself and headed out.  Stopped in at CVS, hoping to score some smokes, tho I should know better by now that all the kids buy them up, as they were all sold out of the ones I wanted.  Settled for some cigarello’s, but didn’t like them as much as the regular ones I buy.  Might go one day during the week to see if they are back in stock.

The drive down to South Jersey is never really that interesting.  Sure, there’s some trees and ground and other cars.  Probly the best part is actually getting to Avalon, as it’s one of those towns literally on the Shore, far removed from everything.  Which would bother some people, but it gives me peace compared to the constant hub of activity I find myself surrounded by.

Jon was already cooking breakfast when I wandered in, and joked that I must have gotten his telepathic message to come down.  We mainly smoked ourselves stupid, watched horror movies all day and talked about random things.

We had one discussion that stands out, because it was just so hilarious.  He was telling me about the teeth the dentist made for him and how he didn’t like the fit.  [Long story short, he had a couple in front knocked out back in the day, and needed to have some new ones due to growing out of the old ones.]  Somehow it spawned from me mentioning the BME BBQ that’s going to be in Jersey.  He was joking that he has another body mod aside from what’s already visible, and that would be his teeth.  So then I suggested he should look into getting custom made teeth that have gems and whatnot in them.  *harhar*  He said he could get some silver teeth or something like that.  The more I thought about it, the more ridiculous it sounded.

Somewhere during the nite he decides to roll a couple of blunts—real ones—and break out the 40s.  Which lead to more interesting conversations as we sat outside in lawn chairs and gazed at the ocean.  The dawn of a new ‘scene’ or ‘genre’ or whatever you want to call it.  It will be loud.  It will be crude.  It will be 100% DIY.  It will be completely ghetto fabulous, yo.  It will be a riot!

Sunday was spent pretty much the same way.  Smoked ourselves stupid and consumed coffee spiked with Bailey’s.

Then Jon suddenly hits me with the notion that he would like to move away from here [read: Jersey] and go somewhere with me.  Considering we were fairly high and semi-drunk, I didn’t put much thought into this nor did we disscuss it further.  Sort of was just something he blurted out and then pretended was never said, so I left it at that.

Before I departed, he asked if he could see me during the week.  This piqued my curiosity.  There are a variety reasons as to why we haven’t really seen each other that often in the past.  Come to think of it, this is the longest he’s been around in the past couple of years that we have been friends.  It’s not that I don’t enjoy spending time with him, because he is my best friend and I wouldn’t ever complain about seeing him too much.  It just struck me as odd…and I do kind of sort of have a relationship with the Asshole.  Didn’t say yes or no…or much of anything while he hugged me tightly.

We parted ways on that note, and it has been eating at me since.  Even now, I’m starting to recall various points of our drunken conversation over the weekend.  He confessed that he gets lonely sometimes, even scared at nite.  What am I supposed to say to that?   While I have stated here that I consider myself single, I am still making visits to the alleged ex and weird things happen which lead me to think we are together even tho we are not really dating in my opinion.

It’s not something I really want to think about too much, but it’s hard to keep thoughts completely blocked out.